Kashmir: a magical experience

A travel Visit to Kashmir is like experiencing a heaven. Cool breeze ,frozen little streams, clear rivers, snowy mountains, beautiful landscapes, hot Kahwa, sweet apples, lovely handicrafts, beautiful Kashmiri handwork, expensive but pure spices, fair people, exciting pony rides, army battalions all these define “Kashmir", the paradise for Indian travelers..!!!
The whole experience starting from the first glimpse of the gigantic snowcapped mountains from the flight to the till you return to your destination is truly incredible. It was like stepping into a freezer the moment we got out of the flight at Srinagar airport in the month of December, and I realized how it felt to be in "COLD". We started our journey in a local taxi arranged by our holiday package, to drop us at our first stop the Dal Lake. I could see normal people with their normal lifestyles and nothing like what we imagine the place to be.

Dal Lake is the second largest lake in Kashmir, first being the Wular Lake in Bandipora district of the state. First thing you observe on Dal Lake, as a traveler will be the innumerable house boats or the 'floating palaces'. We were ferried from the bank of the lake to our houseboat named 'New California', in a taxi boat. These boats are called 'Shikara'. These come in different shapes and sizes to accommodate depending on the number of people, goods being carried etc.

The houseboats built from the local wood (cedar tree) are nothing less than luxury hotels. I was amazed to see the interiors, because the look outside is quite contrasting. They have real well furnished verandah, dining area, heated and well maintained rooms with toilets. The cooking is usually done in another concrete area built behind the wooden boats since; there are dangers of the place catching fire.

We too got a complementary shikara ride in our holiday package, after a hot and delicious lunch we had at the boat. The locals at the hotel offered a hot cup of kahwa ,a special Kashmiri tea prepared with the spices without milk, to keep us warm and fresh/This was at a cost of 50Rs/ cup which was quite costly, what we realized after a couple of days of stay in the place. The tea is supposed to have numerous health benefits one of them being able to aid in digestion.

We were forced to click photos in the traditional Kashmiri costume on a “Studio"shikara, what I mean here is the shikara where a local carries few traditional costumes for both male and female and a digital camera. These Shikaras are the marketing vehicles for the locals present here and no one can miss the locals following the tourist shikaras for selling their items, be it the famous Kashmir spices, vegetables, fruits, local clothes, wooden material, jewellary etc. The ride on the shikara was a nice one, for an exception that the Dal Lake filled with the habitats and house boats looked real ugly filled with filth, and the water in the lake was clearer only towards the open spaces.

The Mughal gardens like Nishat bagh, Shalimar bagh, Naseem bagh are all very poorly maintained, and have nothing much to offer. After a tiresome day, we had a good night's sleep with the bed heater onto the maximum, without which it would have been difficult to even breathe in the chilling weather.

Next day, we started our journey towards Gulmarg the 'meadow of flowers'(though none can be seen in winter), about 50kms from Srinagar. It is a very small town in the Baramulla district of Kashmir.
The place is very quiet and calm since there is not much population here apart from the tourists and guides/pony owners who come for their daily survival. It is a popular skiing destination, since it receives heavy snowfall. The gondola/cable car is a famous attraction here which is a two stage ropeway taking the tourists to the top of the summit.
First level is at around 8,500feet and second level is approximately 13,700 feet of the Kongdori Mountain.
The ride on the Gondola is remarkable with some beautiful landscapes seen from up above. The second level boasts of a picture perfect white heaven. There are snow sports like skiing, sledging etc. which are charged at a hefty price. The line of control (LOC) border can be seen from this level. There is a feeling of elation at the elevation, playing in the white snow....with only white color peaks all around and the blue sky just above you, it feels as if you are in midst of the clouds, sailing with the cool breeze.

There are other small tourist spots which have become popular because of the Bollywood movies shot there like Bobby hut (Bobby), Shiva temple (the famous jai jai shiva shankar song from 'aap ki kasam') and similar places. Pony rides are an option to look around the place or it is an easy possibility to walk around the entire city as it is a very small place with all the attractions at a stone’s throw.

The next destination we started out to is "Pahalgam", a beautiful place on the banks of river Lidder, at an elevation of 7200ft from sea level.
On the way we visited a place called 'Pampore', which is very famous for its saffron cultivation. There are whole bunch of shops available on the way claiming to sell the best dry fruits at best prices. We should have some local guidance before making any buys though. Saffron is supposed to be in its purest form here, and costs around 200Rs/gm. The other dry fruits are also available in abundance, the popular one being walnut as there are lot of walnut trees grown here.
Pahalgam though is a spectacular form of nature's beauty, the landscapes on the way, the river flowing in its full glory, the chirping birds; everything is a treat to the eyes and music to the ears.
One of the important tourist spot in the place is Chandanwari, about 15kms from the place is supposed to be the starting point of the most famous Amarnath yathra.

There is this glacier named 'Kolahoi', which is a hanging glacier, which forms the source of Lidder River.
The Betaab valley is another popular spot which is again named after the hindi movie shot there, Betaab. The place is again picturesque with green lush trees, which were actually barren and full flowing rivers which were frozen into icicles during our visit, owing to the fact that it was winter.

A couple of spots which could be seen only by taking pony rides, were Baisaran valley and the mini switzerland. These places are at an elevation and the route for the same is very steep which cannot be scaled by untrained tourists. Though the pony rides form the livelihood of most of the locals there, there is a tendency of charging the customer with exorbitant price for each pony depending upon the seasons of visit. The summer season will be the peak season where in tourist just pile up and ready to pay whatever the locals demand. Most of the locals try to trick the tourists in every transaction be it pony rides or shopping. So one should have a very clear understanding of the place, items sold and should have the art of bargaining.

On the return way from Pahalgam we visited the apple farms. All we could see were the last few apples on the trees there. Those were deliberately left for hungry tourists to see and confirm that those are apple trees. Best season to see the fruits filling the tree in red, is in september. We could manage to buy a kilo of apple though from the farm there, where loads of the fruit were being packed in craters to be sold. We managed to take a couple of snaps with the local kids also working there. And not to forget a local granny. who refused to take a snap as it is prohibited in their religion to click photos. I somehow convinced her to click a picture with me.We finally let the place with sweetness lingering in our mouth and also hearts..

We passed by small rivers, frozen droplets on tip of leaves, barren trees...beautiful in their own way.

We stopped at Avantiswami temple at Avantipura on the Srinagar-Pahalgam highway..., which one must not miss. Supposed to be one of the oldest temples built by King Awanti varman who ruled in 855AD. now only the ruins are remaining of the ancient Hindu temple. Felt a divine flow of energy standing there ,just thinking of how many devotees might have visited the same temple and the pooja done to the idol there, thousands of years ago. There was a army tank in front of the temple ,because of whatever the reasons of terror caused by human stupidity in the fight for occupancy of a god gifted place.

The final destination wherein we travelled to was Sonamarg. Sonamarg is an alpine valley on the banks of river Nallah Sindh. The drive to Sonamarg is breathtaking, giving a complete picture of the countryside with flowing river, lush green meadows.

Again the routes here are navigable only by ponies, though one can go to some distance by car, but the last stretch of 3km is only with ponies or walk/trek with trained guides. The famous Thajiwas glacier is a popular spot here. The white lofty mountains with a peaceful atmosphere and cool weather. Finally on the way back from Sonamarg we saw a lovely orange hued sunset with the lovely Sindh River flowing gracefully.

The best part of the trip though was that we were part of a group package. That added to the joy of being in an unknown place. Usually group trips can be a pain if people are dis-organized, with no time sense or have an air of superiority and aloofness. But, we were lucky that we had people in our group who had similar frequency of thinking, being punctual for the day trips even with kids, very cordial and friendly nature. It really felt like being between a known set of old friends..

I just could not imagine that the trip ended so early...so many forms of nature's beauty...felt like melting into nature as its own entity and become immortalized in this beautiful place...for eternity.
One can just hope the terrorism and killings end, and the place is left to be 'no man's land ' as it is unfair to destroy such a divine place, for the human greed of power. We were dropped back to the Srinagar airport and unfortunately our flight was postponed to the next day, because of low visibility. So beware that tourists should be ready to be stranded for days in the place if they are travelling in winter. In peak winter, the airport itself will get closed leaving you very few options of commuting. Overall though ironic, it was an adventurous and peaceful trip...!!!
Hope to visit the place again in a different season, as it is told that the place has something different to offer to the tourists in every season.
With so many forms of nature's beauty...you just feel like melting into nature as its own entity and become immortalized in the beautiful place...for eternity.
You are sure to end the journey with an emotional feel and a happy energy of carrying bundles of beautiful images etched in your memory ,and you are forced to say……Kashmir…what a place…!!!it’s nothing less than god’s master piece.

FEW TIPS, if you are planning a trip to the place:
Things to be packed for the trip:
1.Light woolen sweaters for any season, but heavy woolen sweaters and jackets in winter to tolerate the cold.
2.Thermals are also a good option who cannot take in the cold weather at all. Pack more of warm clothes rather than other outfits. Blankets, warm woolen clothing, socks for small kids travelling is also a necessity.
3.Hiking shoes, goggles.
4.Sunscreen lotion, Vaseline or moisturizers, lip balms, umbrella depending on the season of travel.
5.Over the counter medicines for fever, cold, dizziness and vomiting (common in the ghat section and zig zag curves of the mountains) etc. which you have the option to get, but better to keep them handy.
6.Cameras, battery charger, spare battery.

Travelling modes:
1.There are flights, train and bus facilities to reach Srinagar.
2.Flights are available from almost all the places via Delhi, and direct flights are available to Srinagar.
3.The trains and bus facilities are also there but via Jammu.
4.The intercity travel and the local sightseeing can be done by hiring private vehicles/taxis and even auto rickshaws are available in Srinagar city. Even government buses are available to commute within the state.

Must do things/must haves, while in Kashmir:
1.Shikara ride on the Dal Lake and a night’s stay at a luxury houseboat in Srinagar.
2.Skiing at the Gulmarg summit with the guidance from a trainer, of course after negotiating at a reasonable price.
3.White water rafting at the Lidder River, Pahalgam.
4.Trekking at any of the possible locations, with a guide.
5.Pony ride in the Sonamarg region.
6.Click photos in a traditional attire, and also with locals in villages of pahalgam and other places on the way as a memoir.
7.Trying the local Kawah chai, a special Kashmiri tea prepared with the local spices without milk, to keep one’s body warm during the cold and also to aid in digestion.
8.Try the fruits directly from the farm be it apples, oranges or any fresh fruit.

Shopping tips:
1.Never shop any item/deal without bargaining. Reduce the price to at least 50% before settling for a final deal.
2.Shop for Saffron, walnut, Kashmiri chilies’ and other dry fruits at Pampur or anywhere else of which you have prior information from local or your known people.
3.Shop for Pashmina or woolen shawls, sweaters, Kashmiri work dresses, wooden handiwork, artificial jewelry like stone malas, kadas, bangles, carpets at a government based shop rather than in any shop.
4.If shopping at local markets, bargain. Better buy small handicrafts and local jewellary items at Dal lake shikara as they are comparatively cheaper when compared to other places.

Important things to be noted for safety:
1.Dealing with locals, negotiate properly before concluding any price for the item bought/or for guidance in trekking or pony rides.
2.Skii shoes, coats and goggles are sold fooling people with the impression that they cannot bear the cold up in the summit, where as those are not mandatory at all. The normal jackets and hike shoes will save the day.
3.Though the pony rides form the livelihood of most of the locals there, there are possibilities of charging exorbitant price for each pony depending upon the seasons of visit. The summer season will be the peak season where in tourist just pile up and ready to pay whatever the locals demand. Most of the locals try to trick the tourists in every transaction be it pony rides or shopping. So one should have a very clear understanding of the place, items sold and should have the art of bargaining
4.Duplicate products sold as Kashmiri ones at high prices.
5.Fake spices sold as pure. Example is coconut strands colored and sold as Saffron. Test for pure saffron is put a few strands in warm water, the color of the water changes to golden color and the strands expand, whereas duplicate ones just melt away.
6.Don’t carry heavy cash everywhere.
7.Do not roam around alone after dark and always have the hotel address handy.
8.There is no cabin luggage option in the flights from Srinagar airport. So plan to pack your things safely.
9.The security checks at the airport are many and the check in luggage identification is an extra headache for the travelers, without which the baggage will be stranded at the airport itself. Also plan ahead of time to reach the airport.
10.Be ready to have alternatives, in case of flight cancellations in case of low visibility or snowfall especially in winter.
11.There are SBI, Canara bank, J&K ATMs available in Srinagar where one can draw if any emergency cash is needed.

Slow down mother...!!!!

I just generally came across this link..http://www.domesticviolences.com/maid-gets-20-years-jail-for-abusing-baby/...
Really don't know if its true.. but its really sick to watch.. not humane at all.
I didn't want to discuss on this topic before since, it is very debatable especially for those who are very much into career orientation.but finally decided to share it as the thoughts were banging inside my head so much,I wanted it out.
Before I start I want to declare that this is just my point of view,and not to question/criticise anyones judgement/decisions in their lives.

As in today's scenario ,where in most of the women go on with their careers leaving their little ones with maids or helpers,it is mandatorily required to double check on their identities and background.After all what is the use regretting later.
We are all struggling for our children's well being ,whether being at home or working outside..but still I don't get what is the logic of leaving them behind with some strangers in their tender age,where they should be actually cared by the wombs that carried them for 9 months..They require OUR love,affection,nearness...nothing more than that...

Letting them cradle in a daycare,leaving them in some strangers hands are all options which exist but,ultimately what good are we doing to the kid apart from financial planning for the far future....which is really very far...the way their present is getting shaped.
It not only applies to people working but also those who are at home,but away from the task of taking care of their own kids.People who are busy with shopping,parties,other stuff,but children,they are left at the care of some outsiders.
So people who really can take a break or can have alternatives to work from home,can put aside other priorities for sometime,please do it...believe me it is really not worth so much of struggle unless your own family/loved ones look after them.

I know taking a break from career is very subjective..,because a parent's care/attention cannot be limited to a certain period but,forever...
But it is very important/crucial to be there with the young ones in the times he/she needs your maximum love,care and attention.
Don't be with a thinking that anyway they will grow,with or without your presence,guidance....what is the point being in front of them all the time,let them be independent..all that stuff..All these are true,that they will grow anyhow,but the intention of having a kid is not to just let them be on their own from day 1 itself...and in the hands of people who might not have any emotions/concern towards them,obviously as MOST of them handle them as part of their jobs and not with care.

I know it might be considered a compromise or even might be nonsensical to certain people as it may sound:-)taking a break from a high paying job,at high peaks of one's career.And there are certain people who might fear thinking of the repercussions of taking a long break from their careers...of what will happen if they don't get a job tomorrow when they are ready to work....There are few who continue to do things based on what the society might say and shape their lives entirely on the fear of criticism.
I mean lots and lots of thinking,fear of financial turbulance,maintaining the same standard of living in addition with the kids responsibility,society everything comes like a whirlpool inside the already fully trashed head.And finally the decision to forego a kid with certain comfortable and Expensive OPTIONS are the very common solutions which are arrived at.
But just request every women/mother to ponder on a few things before actually taking any decision..
First thing being,the early years when the child is breast feeding and requires a mother's warmth understand no one/no milk formulas can substitute for your presence and the nutrition you give your kid.
Secondly,the growth of a child in different phases from crawling to walking,drooling to teething,babbling to talking gibberish,their smiles,their pranks all milestones is really worth experiencing being with them.Their all activities from morning to midnight exploring each and everything at home be it throwing the utensils in the kitchen and closing their ears,be it smearing themselves with your powder,lipsticks,making the entire floor dirty by spreading all the toys from one corner of the house to the other,bathing with them splashing water,dressing them,singing for them,dancing with them,playing with them,their little naps on your lap,their screams,cries,laughter,smiles,their warm hugs,kisses....everything EVERY aspect of being there with a child as a child makes your life worth living.
Again all these thoughts might vary from person to person,for some these might not matter at all...they might think whats the big deal,how does it compensate for the tons of salary we are getting at the end of each month,loads of things we are buying for the kids...and keeping them happy..
Dnt know whether feelings and emotions really work that way...I mean its the same case in which your husband does not spend any time to be with you for long hours/days and he just buys you expensive things,makes planned investments in your name..(i know it doesnt matter for women who are also working as they also endup being in office...that they dnt care what husbands are doing at times:-))

What ultimately every soul cries for, at the end of the day is LOVE,nearness,care...!!!and not worldly comforts alone.

Am not telling anyone to quit and be a babysitter like me...:-)
All I want to say are a couple of options of "IF U CAN"s,not only for working women but also for other women who are at home still away from their responsibilities.

"IF YOU CAN" afford to take a break during your child's early stage of growth ,it will really make a world of difference to atleast that one soul, whom you wanted so badly to be a part of your lives but,now leaving at the care of odd entities.And women at home ,make an attempt to take care of the kid yourself rather than letting them grow under someone elses supervision.
Even then,don't over-utilise or misuse the support of the elderly people at home making them full time baby sitters.They also require a breather sometimes because of their age and to the fact that child care is not an easy task.

"IF YOU CAN" , look for options working from home..so that you can balance your interests and also take care of the child.

"IF YOU CAN" , take a break and think if the decisions you have taken,things you are doing is really helping someone,atleast is it helping you.If you feel some disturbance and regret,then think over and take decisions which will make you happy..and relieved.

"IF YOU CAN" ,make an attempt to do justice at homefront.Jot down what are your priorities in life and how are you planning to achieve the same.

"IF YOU CAN" , just ponder if you are really working for the heck of it,scared of what people might say that after such a well payed job and being qualified,you are sitting at home.Don't do it,because people are really there for that job...they do their jobs perfectly criticising whether you are in job or at home...
Ask me..I have got real good experience getting all the gyaan from them,that am wasting my education and stuff:-)

Lastly,"IF YOU CAN" ,even with a career to follow,try spending some value time with your kids,give them love,moral values,and give them a reality check.Never bring them up with a life is rosy feeling,pouring them with luxuries...make them understand the bitter facts of life and bring them up in a mode where in they can adapt to any circumstances and face any challenges in life.

And still if you feel,"NO,career is the top most priority for me",or you have certain commitments which you cannot forego at any cost, then please go ahead....
BUT,please make an attempt,you leave the poor souls in the hands of your parents/family...or with really trustable people and not with some outsiders.

I just smile at people who try to question my life,because it was COMPLETELY my decision to quit.And till today I stay determined on the same that I took the best decision of my life.As I have experienced /experiencing and living life from my kiddo's perspective in every little thing she does,the umpteen moments of joy she gives me just being there,am just rejoicing ..every single moment...being a mother....!!!(I JUST DONT CARE even if people call me a BABY SITTER,'JUST a HOME MAKER'...or whatever..as long it makes them happy)

And to end my write up,I really salute all the women who manage to strike a balance with their work and life...as it is not an easy task to struggle in the outside world full of everyday challenges and also manage the hardships at homefront.Sometimes,I feel a wee bit jealous also looking at such successful people who are able to do the dual role..:-),as am unsuccessful in doing the same.

And yeah I know US has a very short maternity leave, and their way of bringing up their kids is also very different in many aspects.
Am not telling it's bad, it's a good thing to make kids independent, but will they understand all this in their crawling age....that I wonder...And comparing our day care standards to US will not be logical, since they are way ahead in all the aspects compared to us....Again...as I said it's just my viewpoint...and not to challenge anyone's way of life:-)

People can question me ,which world am in ..as women are establishing themselves successfully and are at high positions in their career everywhere..
I understand that world over women are scaling up the ladder of their career with success, have become CEOs of companies...I also respect them and highly envious of them...but am not targeting any of them...unless for that specific percentage of them, who have failed in their personal lives...

To rephrase things again to make things clear for people who feel offended, I am not generalizing anything saying all working women vouch only for money...and they don't care for their children.....I know its very natural that every mother loves her kid more than her life...but as in every case.. there are exceptions...and these are the specific categories of people whom I have seen/been seeing with my very own eyes and am in fact addressing them very particularly,who leave their kids as small as 3-4months in daycares/maids etc...who keep crying most of the day...
I mean what will a child as small as that which cries for expressing whatever it's needs are be it of hunger, uneasiness or pain can really understand anything about being independent..
I am addressing such population, who can think about having some option ,rather letting things go so casually.. which actually needs some thought..
I know and I also understand women should be independent and have their own identities.. but not at the cost of losing our edge so much that finally it will be difficult to identity ourselves in life..
Children will anyway grow up as individuals with characters not only groomed by us. but by the society...once they venture out into the big cruel world. But I just feel,there are certain age limits to define everything. I mean ultimately it's an option of what we can do ...or what we might not want to do.. for our little ones.

Where are we going as a nation??

Don't know where we are heading as a nation....mid-day meal crisis, gang rapes on minors, acid attacks, robberies, killings, assaults, kidnapping, corruption, political dramas...so many atrocities, ugly deeds make the headlines everyday...!!!
Really very difficult to digest...

Every nation will have its own set of problems. but to this extent at the cost of people's lives for own selfish motives???:-((.I really doubt.
I don't feel safe at all in my own country...!!!...really scared as to what does the future hold for our little ones in this country. I don't blame the country but that section of the people and their mindset which is making this place dangerous..
Wondering whether.. poverty, selfish, ignorant and useless politicians, we stupid people who get them elected to lead.all of them together...!!!!

The only saving grace of India being the moral and cultural values are also already going down the drain be it by any cause... fast life, money mindedness, endless selfish desires, emotionless lives, families minus love, affection and bonding..
... I really wish there was some power to repair everything....to make the world a better place to live in for every being...at least for a day.!!!....does not matter if the earth is destroyed the very next minute. Also its true that there is nothing worthy in the present for the mother earth to hold on......that is why we are facing nature's wrath in different ways...but don't know when will she decide to sleep once and for all to eternity...
but before that just for a day ...let everything and everyone be with love, affection and complete peace...!!!live and let live...be happy...spread happiness...!!!just for a day...hope it happens...sometime....maybe..

GOD ...are u listening....????? why don't u join some social networking by the way...you can get a more clear picture of what is going on and which wiring has gone wrong in your mega invention called the HUMAN:-))))

Multiply your happiness,not your assets.

Shared the joy of my little one's 2nd birthday with the other little ones, deprived of love but still full of joy and innocence..at Arya Sevashrama Trust, Rajajinagar, Bangalore
Seriously felt such a flow of positive energy and happiness being able to share our affection and love with them,even though for a short duration..All of them were so disciplined and hardworking that I think even our kids studying in reputed institutions can learn a lot from their way of life.I felt so satisfied,as they happily feasted on their lunch without wasting any food.

On the other end,a pang of shame also came rising in my gut thinking of the way people lavishly spending money on parties,treats etc. where there are actually no hungry stomachs, ...and loads of food is wasted.
The buffet lunch/dinner cost per person at most of the restaurants today,can serve food to atleast 25 hungry stomachs...
I agree that everyone has their own families and their own mode of enjoyment,but one can always try to accomodate a few noble activities to help others in need.One need not get into full fledged NGO work for doing this,least they can do is share their special occasions with them,share the things used/never going to used in your house but just lying there in attics.. be it clothes,books,toys,household items whatever.

I cannot question anyone's freedom of expression on how they wish to spend their hard earned money,but just request everyone to rethink once before spending on anything unnecessarily,as there are other really useful things that the same money can buy for the needy.Still Whatever we might donate/share, we will always find a void in their eyes,feel an emptiness in a corner of the heart which cannot be filled by any of our contributions,donations or anything.

Can just pray to god to keep them happy and healthy..and in case Mr.God has any future project plans of creating another world :-) just urge him to make it a place where every being is equally fortunate and share equal privilages.

For all of you,only one small piece of advice,Share your happiness,make others smile....,you will be at the receiving end of what you gave,multiplied several times...!!!
What more can you ask for, to be contented in your life...!!!

Luv always..:-)

Get a life ...stop and retrospect...everyone has only 24 hours a day..

People are so busy nowadays..that they need to plan prior going to washroom also, let alone maintaining/balancing relationships..
Oflate,One of my relative called me possessive..!!!another friend told that I don't understand her situation,another told she is completely busy that she does not have time for herself..all this,because I asked them the reason for not keeping in touch,not taking my calls, not answering my mails,not updating me with their whereabouts,not giving me their new number..etc etc..even after my umpteen attempts to connect with them.
Finally once in a blue moon I get a call asking me where was I all these days,and it is again actually not a casual call to check my welbeing but,with a hidden selfish reason behind it.It might be to ,get someone elses phone number address,get some other information, to invite me for a function etc.
Some even think they are doing a favor by calling/inviting me for occasions special to them because they want to meet certain people only on auspiscious days.Some say they want my best wishes on that day...funny it is for me...as I always pray and wish for my close ones welfare, beyond any occasions or days. They are always in my prayers.
I agree it is a great time to be with all the loved ones on your special days..but for me I treat any/every moment as special if it is well spent with people and that day is auspicious for me when I get my friends calling me without any reason but just to show they are there and to share certain things which they once used to..

There is also no need to remember any birthdays,anniversaries as everything is automated nowadays, with software applications doing everything for you without putting any strain on you.No feeling attached just messages, scraps ,tweets, what more do you require for communication...to say some are even busy for that..

And when I try to show my anger, but a friendly one on them not being in touch with me before, all their frustration of all other aspects in their lives comes on me in a blamegame that I also never made an effort to keep in touch,and I don't understand their busy lives and problems.They would not even realise what senseless words are they speaking in defense since they feel offended by themselves. Either hey would not have checked their mails, calls, messages, sent by me or might have even ignored them sometimes..but ultimately am blamed.
Sounds great na...but I have just one question for all you 24/7 busy people..do only you have family, children, work and do only you have all the problems in the world only in your family,only at your home????

Come on people,it makes no sense.Everyone has family,problems,issues,hassles everything.Its just how we handle and maintain things separately which matters.Just because we are in a new relationship,have a new commitment,a new job or a new problem whatsoever it is, it CANNOT handicap us in keeping other old relationships(*which mattered to us before) alive.
I think its a failure on our part if we are saying we don't have time for all this since we were/are busy with our other priorities.

Some people tell me that since I don't work now and only a 'HOME MAKER',I have all the time in the world for all this lecturing.but they don't realise I do have 10 times their work at home doing multi tasks of baby sitting, cooking, cleaning, washing, planning, buying groceries etc. I also am busy..but I have always believed and maintained myself,and tried to maintain the relations with my close ones unruffled by any other aspects/issues in my life.But I must say only countable are remaining now,out of all the people I emotionally connected with.

I used to make all the attempts possible to connect with people in different ways earlier. but later I somehow felt am forcing myself on them with their response which was always 'no response'.I might have argued,questioned them,but only because I felt the hurt..Am sorry people it was only because I was an emotional fool who felt nothing was more important than you,at that time.but now I have slowly withdrawn myself from this vicious circle and become more practical like you, otherwise it was only me who is going to be in pain after all.I have started avoiding all the people who care a damn in even making an attempt to stay in touch..

Thanks to people who brought in this change in me to mind my own business. They have actually helped me taking all the pain which used to bother me with their carelessness.And just as a return gift,want to share a few facts of life which might be difficult for them to digest.

I don't think it is hard to manage anything in life,just a little planning,sorting out yourself and your time,retrospecting your life as to why you don't get time for anything apart from your routine tasks, is what is needed.If still you feel 24 hours is insufficient and I don't understand your 'BUSY' life, then am really sorry...carry on..rush through your lives,maintaining only your new priorities..,run,run,keep running...until you achieve everything you desire..
You will be left with only void , when you look back..!!!

Only request,people who fall in this category please dont change yourself so much that it is difficult to recognise yourself in the mirror..Get a life,for yourself first...later you can think about others!!!
Value people who cared/care for you,supported you at times,value their emotions,value their feelings,value the bondings you shared with people apart from time,money,luxury,family ties..etc

And for people who still term me as 'possessive'...so be it.If my writeup portays me as unreasonable,illogical,rude and possessive....then am proud to be one..Thank you..and I still cherish you in my memories because you no longer exist in real life for me!!!

Redefining love on Valentine's day

A Beautiful emotion,a feeling of someone being there,being cared for,a jolt of happiness felt within at times,sometimes undefinable,unexplained,sometimes painful sometimes caressing,a feel ruling or defines our lives 'LOVE'...a priceless
gift,bonding everyone together!!!
For me, its not constrained to only 2 individuals but to anyone and everyone attached to us and make a difference to our lives be it children, family, friends or sometimes other relations which go unnamed.

Its a pity and truth of the current world that 'Love' is no more an entity between people/living beings alone,its gone beyond that.Love for lifeless objects,love for lust,love for money,luxury,comfort,love for fame,love for authority,love for power,love for negativity,hatred,fights,killings,war..and the list goes on...

It really hurts seeing people in unruly,mad passion struggling for all the temporal aspects in life and inturn harm others lives as well.I just hope people realise the importance of the emotion and do not do deeds which will make the meaning of it sound so silly,artificial and plastic.

It is a genuine feeling which comes from within, and should be used to bring happiness to as many people as possible in whatever ways we can,be it within our own families,or outside world who are deprived of the emotion...spread love,spread affection,care for others.Nothing can make our lives worthwhile in the span of 60-70 years,than the good deeds we do and if we can make a positive difference in others lives who are in need, there will be no regrets on our final journey.

We may not be there.but we will leave our mark in places we cannot imagine to have travelled i.e. people's hearts...!!!
Why not make the world a better place to live for us and our next generation by inculcating and spreading the message/meaning of love in everyone lives around us.This kind of epidemic is what is needed for the world now..

Love one love all....A very happy Valentines day to all you lovely people..who make a difference to my life...thank you for being there..!!!

Marriage...make or break,its your own take

Though technology is bringing age old relations/friends together no matter from whichever corner of the world,the major issue in the current day scenario is,it is devoid of any emotion called love attached to it.

Marriage,especially nowadays is like playing an online game.Fast they happen,faster they break.The trust and liking between a couple diminish so easily leading to divorces in no time.All because of EGO clashes,fading interest in each other,stubborn attitudes,self-dependence with zero love and understanding.The couple should realise that, no one is perfect and similar to us.
I mean yes, everyone wants things to happen in their way in life and everything.but when life itself is so unpredictable taking us for a roller-coaster ride every other day giving an adreline rush;why expect something so specific to yourself from your partner who is also a ordinary being just like you with his/her own set of liking and disliking?

Either person in the bondage should be sensible in adjusting to things without blowing small/petty issues out of proportion every time and make him/her realise their mistakes without a quarrel/blamegame.If both get stubborn on the same issue then the only easy solution which arises is breakup,which leaves both parties free..but ultimately creating a permanent void in their lives.
All the things in life come with a set of compromises and sacrifices.If someone tells me that they are leading their lives without any compromises and with full satisfaction,I will take some time to digest the lie..

I think youngsters and other people today really need to think many a times about getting into a relationship to avoid just jumping in and out of relationships like hopping in and out of a moving bus.People eloping against their parents wish,committing suicidal acts after a failed relation,pre-maritals..etc etc..
They need to really give a thought for the life ahead of them,whether they are really serious in leading a life with that person and it is just not physical attraction/intimacy which is making them take such abrupt actions opposing everyone.

A marriage/or any other bonding will work only by mutual RESPECT,unbreakable TRUST,ACCEPTANCE of a person as him/herself along with his family, traits and never with a mindset of moulding his/her thoughts,behavior and everything in his/her life to completely match and satisfy ones own wishful lifestyle.
YES,if the person is really going in a wrong direction,as a companion of his/her life you have all the rights to advice and get the person back on track.but in a tactical way,by showering your love and affection.

Marriage is something which requires a lot of patience,co-operation and understanding between 2 beings to stay afloat happily in the huge sea called life.so once we dive into it we should expect and be ready to face any small ripples,
or huge waves, or whirlpools and even floods...learn to swim supporting each other,have a life jacket of love and you will never drown..

In every road,every turn of every phase of life there are speed breakers just to remind ourselves that we need to slowdown,sitback,think and retrospect what have we achieved in life ; money, status, fame. Yes, but relationships..??a soulmate to lend a shoulder to cry on,be your pillar of support in all the walks of your life..???

Though one ingredient is definitely same for any successful and happy bonding...LOVE,there is no fixed formula for a marriage to work.Everyone has to understand,balance and derive their own formulas to run a successful marital life.but keeping in mind that the attempt in deriving it should focus in maintaining the relation rather than breaking it.

Coming out of a relationship is easy.but I feel it is worth thinking atleast once before whether its really worth it!!!because nobody is perfect and you can never find a being without traits which you might not like.Though you feel lighter on your shoulders on breaking out and coming,your soul will always be burdened by the baggage of a failure for your entire life!!There is nothing more beautiful in this world than the wonderful friendship you share with your soulmate.

Once understood the fact what am trying to convey by my write up and attempting to follow,I guarantee that both in the relation will emerge as winners..as there is no scope for losing!!!

Rockabye baby.....sleep 'PEACE'fully not 'PIECE'fully....

My little one was babbling something continuously as I was trying to put her to sleep in my lap. Like all the kids she does not want to sleep.. its a struggle to go into the sleep mode. but once she decides to sleep its just a matter of seconds. Finally tired of what she was doing and overpowered by my shhhh shhhhh's she closed her eyes and dozed of almost immediately. All it took was just about half a minute for her to really fall asleep...and what a peaceful undisturbed sleep it is!!!I know though its a short one it will be her power nap. Now I realize how these tiny pranksters are full of energy anytime and every time, they are never depleted of it, unlike us at the end of every small chore.

The power naps they take are so peaceful, undisturbed, and without any mind distortions, illusions. This kind of sleep we grownups can hardly afford to get, because of the continuous thought process which keeps us pre-occupied anytime and every time. The thoughts, plans of what was done, what is being done, what is to be done...,past, present, future, everything revolving in our mind which hardly lets our brain to rest. Sleep is such a wonderful and essential commodity in our lives, that only few fortunate people manage to get very peaceful sleep. but most of the people do have problems resting their ever running flow of thoughts..

So many wandering thoughts, ambitions, plans, apprehensions.. god!!!our mind is so restless always wandering. Yeah we do sleep in a snap, once our body is worn out of heavy work, but even after 6-8 hours of sleep we still feel so lousy and tired, never charged with energy.. we will be in a sleep mode..:-)still retaining the data in RAM.. or hibernating..
I feel sometimes we also should have had a power button to just shutdown at the end of the day, completely deleting the clutter in our mind, not carrying any burden and reboot again completely feeling fresh and more energetic.

Anyways since we cannot change the way we are manufactured even in future versions of our breed, all we can do is voluntarily try to mimic a machine's way of life to SLEEP, as we already are perfect in following and imitating its other features in the current world..be it work, feelings or anything...its a complete MECHANICAL world ..
Ok...time for me to run, my ENERGISER has woken up charging herself with whatever energy required for her pranks, to last for the remaining day..!!
Though I could not recharge my batteries by sleep, I recharged myself sharing this with you.. and anyways I can always take lessons from by baby to CHARGE up.. what say...

Being happy is a child's play...

My little ANTI-sleep angel manages to catch a small tiny-winy nap. I have a long list of tasks queued up. but first I decide to set up some wall décor for my angel to give her some pretty sights around the room. I quickly decide to do arrange everything and stick some pretty fairies, little cartoon characters, animals etc and just as I see her groggily waking up, I hop beside her as if I had been there all the time beside her. She climbs onto my lap still in sleepy mode, slowly glancing around the room, spots something at the corner of the wall, then her eyes wide she looks around and sees the wall full of colorful animated friends...,she then stands up in sheer excitement shouting in her baby language and starts dancing merrily...
When we are outside in the hall for lunch, she runs to the room to admire her new friends, every now and then..so happy and excited.

What an irony, as we grownups PLAN when we should be happy, these little gifts from god cherish every little moment coming across be it a small toy, a small joy, a hug from their loved ones and anything small.
We as elders should also look for happiness in small petty things/occasions be it spending time with your loved ones, sharing a laugh or two, sing a song(doesn't matter if you are not a trained singer), read a book you kept pending for sometime, attempt to cook new, play like a child with your child, call and speak to an old friend, hug your loved one.. list is endless.. Yes!!happiness is in all these and more..I learnt, Happiness in life is not something to be planned/postponed..i.e.... we should never have a feeling that if we achieve/get something what we desire, then we will be happy. because it is a vicious circle of more desires without any joy at that moment of achievement.

Destination is only another hairpin curve in the rigorous path of life which leads to more desires and hence more milestones set by ourselves to feel happy at a later point of time when they are met/achieved, which might or might not happen. So, ultimately we will never be happy and always in a loop of desires and more desires...
Realize, Happiness is not a destination but, the journey of life itself...the moments, experiences, learning...the whole journey of life!!!As I am trying to understand and unravel the definition of life in a whole new perspective from the small innocent acts of my child everyday, every moment..... and sharing it with you, my little one runs again to check on her new wall friends.. screaming happily:-)

Best roleplay in life...being a MOTHER

She just wakes up slightly amidst her nap,tries to feel me beside her reading a book, realizes that am not there,slowly runs her sight lying there all over the dimly lit room,sees me sitting at the corner end of her bed working on my laptop...
Crawls and gets onto my lap,smiles and goes back to sleep as I lovingly caress her head...deeply asleep knowing that she is now safe in her cozy secure zone...

These little moments which may sound very normal or even petty for some people are actually very beautiful if felt from within..aah..an inner joy and the solace having your child in your arms for whom YOU mean everything, her entire World..!!!
In whatever way ,I try to put my feelings in words of all the mute communications had with my child...I will definitely fail to reflect the exact feelings felt.....it is undefinable and unexplainable in any words of dictionary.

Being a mother ,the lovely bonding with your child is definitely the best thing you can experience in your entire life as a woman....Heavenly!!!it is...
hope all the other mothers agree...

Children - god are synonyms

Just 2 minutes after getting yelled/spanked....at,she just comes lovingly saying 'ammammammmma" and lies down on my lap...and in a minute or 2 of my swinging her she just sails into a deep sleep peacefully with a lovely godly smile on her lips, as if nothing happened...!!!and making me feel terribly bad about myself for what i did...

Forget and forgive...no negative feelings inside..no grudges.no ...ill feelings...no past trash...just lead life for the day,for the moment...as if there is no tomorrow...

Everytime making us elders/adults realise that we still need to learn as to how to LIVE our lives....
Trying to live my life now..from my angel's point of view...love u my lil one...for coming into my life and making me realise so many things..!!!.which we feel are complicated...but are quite simplistic if we try and implement...

Emotional Journey of being a Mother..

what can be more enjoyable for a mother than her child singing...."mammamammamamma" all the way ...all the day.....AM JUST LOVVVING IT...

how time flies...!!!the one who was giving u naughty kicks inside the womb sometime back has now slowly started exploring the world outside observing, touching, tasting, chewing, biting, breaking everything around, accomplishing her little milestones for movement from rolling, crawling, to standing, walking ....falling many times but never failing at any stage.....

Its really a life time experience looking at your child grow !!!!a new experience everyday...
Wish time should halt for a while to let us cherish these moments with the tiny god sent gift!!!as slowly the innocence,sinless clear souls will be lost somehow somewhere as they grow up and venture into the hard challenging and cruel world....!!!!
I am scared to face that day...I hope it never comes and she remains a baby angel cozy in her mamma's arms.

The eternal joy of motherhood...

A child's smile can really do wonders....all the tensions, disturbances of life vanishes when i see my angel smiling looking at my face and babbling in a baby language gooing and gawing....enjoying motherhood ...truly in love with my current life..

Those tiny delicate fingers caressing me, holding onto my finger tightly, those beautiful eyes gazing in delight seeing the person who carried in her womb for 9 months, the rosy pink lips breaking into a lovely smile when she is playing with the unknown power which created her, the little legs kicking in full energy, the child so full of life also fills a woman's life with happiness and fulfillment.

Gives a sense of life and purpose to live...Thank you my love, for giving me a reason to live.
I will be with you, guiding you holding your hands UNTIL and UNLESS you want to break free and lead your own journey...

QUEEN....a royal journey of a helpless Woman...!!!

"QUEEN" is a must watch for all the movie buffs..
Really felt so good after seeing something meaningful after all the 'VOID of LOGIC' blockbusters from the KHANS of bollywood....be it Chennai express, Jai ho or Dhoom 3.
Kangana Ranaut has proved her acting prowess before. but this one with her heart touching, down to earth, girl next door performance she definitely nails it.
The other supporting characters in the movie also fit in perfectly, with very natural performances they also deserve an applause..

I mean, here is a complete women-centric themed plot which takes you in a complete joy ride throughout the 2.5 hours movie, but not foregoing the reality aspect.
It really makes so much of sense to every individual that there is LIFE beyond marriage and other commitments, especially the case where the girl is subdued, made to forget her individuality and live under a man's foot as per his rules and ways.
There is so much to explore and do in life, and the world is Huuuuuugggggeeeeee!!!!
So embark on the journey of life in the path which keeps you happy, explore, unwind, do things which you enjoy and live happily.
Every scene in the movie takes you through an emotional rollercoaster, with more tears of joy though....it strikes a chord with every audience at some point or the other.
A wonderful experiment with truth from director Vikas Bahl.

The songs though are less, are soulful and each one reflects the situation in the movie perfectly, that you actually enjoy hearing them even the first time..
I just loved the final song 'Kinare',with the real inspiring lyrics and its beautiful portrayal by the realistic expressions of the heroine. One of the line says "gar maajhi saare saath mein gair ho Bhi jaayein; To khud hi to Patwaar Ban Paar honge hum", which means ,if the boatman(or all those who support us) become strangers at times, then we ourselves should become the oars and cross the sea to reach the shore.

So, never ever worry that there is no one to support you in life, you always have yourself,so have complete faith in yourself and you will never get disappointed. If you ever need a helping hand, you will always find one at the end of your arm.

Definitely recommended to everyone to watch it on big screen..!!!
***PLs don't take small kids with you(below 12), because there are more of adult material/scenes not for children. So you might be bombarded with questions you cannot answer later:-)

DHOOM 3..Aamir's double dose...

Though not a fan of action flicks or DHOOM series(as all of them are devoid of logic) caught up with DHOOM-3 only for Aamir khan !!!

Khan is as usual playing his role to perfection be it comedy, action, emotion, romance, innocence, he is bollywood's Kamal hasan for me.. Kudos to him for trying a new genre of playing an avenger.
One more addition to his treasury of good performances..!!! but I don't want to talk abt Abhishek bacchan and Uday chopra,as their roles are not worthy of talking about.One should see their introduction in the movie and dialogues. God!!! you will feel like killing yourself for sitting through the torture.And Katrina is used as an ornate piece in the complete movie again devoid of any meaningful role for her.She has screen presence even lesser than Jai dixit and Ali!!!
Songs are so-so,except for the Kamli song which Sunidhi Chauhan has rendered powerfully and Katrina has danced reasonably well and the dhoom title track which is played at the end with the names scrolling on screen..

I think Dhoom series should come to an end with this, as its the same tale of old cops chasing the thieves.
Thank god atleast the theives are changing.otherwise its a pain to see abhishek and Uday..!!!though in this sequel Aamir was like dispirin for the pain caused by them...
A one time watch for sure for a fan of Aamir and bollywood..!!!