Mother is definitely the first teacher, role model..as a child grows up seeing and interacting only with her in a larger slice of its childhood.
Me like most of the others have learnt a lot from my creator.. that being my mother.
She though wasn't fortunate to be educated in those old days by her parents, she didn't lack the confidence in dealing with the life which followed after her marriage be it working 24/7 at home for her in laws family or venturing successfully into a city life after the village life. She was socially very strong and was of friendly nature, had loads of friends. With my father's small salary, her ability in handling our complete family with 4 kids was really appreciable. We never ever felt the lack of anything even in our small house, because of the love and affection showered by her.
Luckily for her,we as kids were also understanding and never demanding.
We somehow were leading a happy contented life.. even in those circumstances, which I feel we lack in the current state of life even after having everything in abundance when compared to those days.
My memories of my mother in my early childhood is that of a simple woman very beautiful both inside and outside, who was independently handling all the outside transactions, struggling hard everyday, and bought us up with pride without taking any debts from anyone..in any form for any occasion. She used to save those 10Rs of auto by walking 2 kms to get the kerosene for stove. She used to carry huge bags of groceries on her own.. and never ever complained. She never even complained about lack of money or anything and always kept us happy.
As a child I picked up a lot of things, habits automatically from my mother.. but as I grew up I started picking up the qualities which I admired specifically in her.
I learnt the art of multi tasking from my mother, her patience in greeting, serving everyone with a smile is something which I admire the most.
She will cook for us anything at any time of the day and never say am tired or bored to cook today, even if she is tired or not well. That nature is something I personally respect as it comes with oodles of patience...and I intend to definitely learn that from her, at least trying.
Her confidence in dealing/communicating even with unknown people with a vibrant energy is something I have adapted in my lifestyle.
Her interest in learning things is amazing even at this age, which is admirable. I hope I maintain the same zeal of knowledge at her age....
Apart from all the good learning from our mothers.. there is another reverse face of the subject I want to discuss on..i.e. again learning process for us , but from the "Not so good" traits in them.
I feel everyone including our mothers will have both good and bad in them.. and it's not that they are perfect in everyway.
Anyway as per me, what ultimately matters is what we learn from them and how we adapt those learning's to suit our situations .. be it either doing/dealing with things in the right way like they do or by not doing/handling/behaving like them under certain circumstances.
Either ways we can better ourselves. We can pick up good traits, we can also pick up their bad traits but using them after negating them to suit our personality and life.
For illustrating this, I am specifying here on certain things my mother does which cannot be termed say bad or negative ,but which are not preferred by me in my way of life.
One major trait of my mother is she judges people very easily which I feel is not right. We should always give the other person a benefit of doubt, some time, space to explain themselves.. or try to get their perspective before coming to a harsh judgment.
Other thing is she is overly sensitive, is very emotional and cries almost instantaneously over paltry things or others behavior / remarks / comments. This one trait I feel has rubbed off on my genes, but one which I completely dislike about myself.
I really feel like a loser when tears roll down my eyes on every other occasion, for trivial issues/reasons making me lower my self esteem in my own eyes rather than the onlooker's eyes.
I realize this and detest the mood around every time I see my mother reacting that way, creating unnecessary commotion, negative vibrations when it's not called for. Here, My conscience tells me it's not correct, this is not what I would/should do if encountered with such a situation.
As a learning from this trait, am constantly working on building myself emotionally more stronger, so that am more bolder in facing, handling situations without making my eyes wet and losing my confidence.
Yes, my mother as my first teacher has illustrated/ taught me numerous aspects of life, it's harsh realities, and ways to cope up with the various situations/challenges it throws in, in her own way.
Promptly putting it, I have picked up and adapted/trying to adapt these lessons based on their suitability and necessity in my life as a dedicated and smart student.
It's not that am projecting my mother as a negative personality. but just trying to stress that no human is perfect to be worshiped or followed completely. We are in the constant process of learning from different experiences of life. And its less costly for us when we learn from others, their mistakes, their experience.
As I said, we can do a lot of learning from every person both good and bad ..essential and non-essential. It's just that we should have an eye to identify them, categorize them, nurture the good/essential traits to take them to the next level and negating the bad/non-essential ones to positive ones and embed them into our lives.
Me, being a mother myself , I now know what examples I should set for my child to follow being her first teacher. I want her to groom her with things which my mother missed or ignored teaching me as a kid unintentionally or intentionally. of course today's world is much more challenging and we need to prepare our little ones to face the world with a strong will and head.
But looking at my child's growth everyday and the way she has made me look at life in a different perspective with her innocent gestures at times...I feel the reverse is true i.e. the child is the first teacher for a mother. She has taught me to forgive and forget, enjoy the small moments to be happy, appreciate small things of life...to have a happy go lucky attitude....to be happy at the present moment and not worrying for tomorrow.
I am again not a perfect role model for my daughter to follow for everything as her mother. And as she grows, she might adapt different alternatives looking at the way I deal with my life under different situations.
But yes.. I will try to give her the best possible guidance and base, and will support her to climb the ladder of learning things on her own. Will not hold her hands, but will hold the ladder firm cheering her to climb on her own will with confidence, without fear and apprehensions of falling down..
Instilling confidence in her that even if she falls accidentally, she will only fall into my caring, protective arms.. or on the warm bed of love which I would have laid, in my absence..
As they tell a mother's love for her child is boundless...for eternity...!!!
Me like most of the others have learnt a lot from my creator.. that being my mother.
She though wasn't fortunate to be educated in those old days by her parents, she didn't lack the confidence in dealing with the life which followed after her marriage be it working 24/7 at home for her in laws family or venturing successfully into a city life after the village life. She was socially very strong and was of friendly nature, had loads of friends. With my father's small salary, her ability in handling our complete family with 4 kids was really appreciable. We never ever felt the lack of anything even in our small house, because of the love and affection showered by her.
Luckily for her,we as kids were also understanding and never demanding.
We somehow were leading a happy contented life.. even in those circumstances, which I feel we lack in the current state of life even after having everything in abundance when compared to those days.
My memories of my mother in my early childhood is that of a simple woman very beautiful both inside and outside, who was independently handling all the outside transactions, struggling hard everyday, and bought us up with pride without taking any debts from anyone..in any form for any occasion. She used to save those 10Rs of auto by walking 2 kms to get the kerosene for stove. She used to carry huge bags of groceries on her own.. and never ever complained. She never even complained about lack of money or anything and always kept us happy.
As a child I picked up a lot of things, habits automatically from my mother.. but as I grew up I started picking up the qualities which I admired specifically in her.
I learnt the art of multi tasking from my mother, her patience in greeting, serving everyone with a smile is something which I admire the most.
She will cook for us anything at any time of the day and never say am tired or bored to cook today, even if she is tired or not well. That nature is something I personally respect as it comes with oodles of patience...and I intend to definitely learn that from her, at least trying.
Her confidence in dealing/communicating even with unknown people with a vibrant energy is something I have adapted in my lifestyle.
Her interest in learning things is amazing even at this age, which is admirable. I hope I maintain the same zeal of knowledge at her age....
Apart from all the good learning from our mothers.. there is another reverse face of the subject I want to discuss on..i.e. again learning process for us , but from the "Not so good" traits in them.
I feel everyone including our mothers will have both good and bad in them.. and it's not that they are perfect in everyway.
Anyway as per me, what ultimately matters is what we learn from them and how we adapt those learning's to suit our situations .. be it either doing/dealing with things in the right way like they do or by not doing/handling/behaving like them under certain circumstances.
Either ways we can better ourselves. We can pick up good traits, we can also pick up their bad traits but using them after negating them to suit our personality and life.
For illustrating this, I am specifying here on certain things my mother does which cannot be termed say bad or negative ,but which are not preferred by me in my way of life.
One major trait of my mother is she judges people very easily which I feel is not right. We should always give the other person a benefit of doubt, some time, space to explain themselves.. or try to get their perspective before coming to a harsh judgment.
Other thing is she is overly sensitive, is very emotional and cries almost instantaneously over paltry things or others behavior / remarks / comments. This one trait I feel has rubbed off on my genes, but one which I completely dislike about myself.
I really feel like a loser when tears roll down my eyes on every other occasion, for trivial issues/reasons making me lower my self esteem in my own eyes rather than the onlooker's eyes.
I realize this and detest the mood around every time I see my mother reacting that way, creating unnecessary commotion, negative vibrations when it's not called for. Here, My conscience tells me it's not correct, this is not what I would/should do if encountered with such a situation.
As a learning from this trait, am constantly working on building myself emotionally more stronger, so that am more bolder in facing, handling situations without making my eyes wet and losing my confidence.
Yes, my mother as my first teacher has illustrated/ taught me numerous aspects of life, it's harsh realities, and ways to cope up with the various situations/challenges it throws in, in her own way.
Promptly putting it, I have picked up and adapted/trying to adapt these lessons based on their suitability and necessity in my life as a dedicated and smart student.
It's not that am projecting my mother as a negative personality. but just trying to stress that no human is perfect to be worshiped or followed completely. We are in the constant process of learning from different experiences of life. And its less costly for us when we learn from others, their mistakes, their experience.
As I said, we can do a lot of learning from every person both good and bad ..essential and non-essential. It's just that we should have an eye to identify them, categorize them, nurture the good/essential traits to take them to the next level and negating the bad/non-essential ones to positive ones and embed them into our lives.
Me, being a mother myself , I now know what examples I should set for my child to follow being her first teacher. I want her to groom her with things which my mother missed or ignored teaching me as a kid unintentionally or intentionally. of course today's world is much more challenging and we need to prepare our little ones to face the world with a strong will and head.
But looking at my child's growth everyday and the way she has made me look at life in a different perspective with her innocent gestures at times...I feel the reverse is true i.e. the child is the first teacher for a mother. She has taught me to forgive and forget, enjoy the small moments to be happy, appreciate small things of life...to have a happy go lucky attitude....to be happy at the present moment and not worrying for tomorrow.
I am again not a perfect role model for my daughter to follow for everything as her mother. And as she grows, she might adapt different alternatives looking at the way I deal with my life under different situations.
But yes.. I will try to give her the best possible guidance and base, and will support her to climb the ladder of learning things on her own. Will not hold her hands, but will hold the ladder firm cheering her to climb on her own will with confidence, without fear and apprehensions of falling down..
Instilling confidence in her that even if she falls accidentally, she will only fall into my caring, protective arms.. or on the warm bed of love which I would have laid, in my absence..
As they tell a mother's love for her child is boundless...for eternity...!!!
I certainly agree to some points that you have discussed on this post. I appreciate that you have shared some reliable tips on this review.
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